I've spent the last two days locked in endless meetings. Only two more days to go. One of the highlights today was being referred to as the "poster child" for security research. My first instinct was to rebut the comment. However, that feeling was quickly replaced by pride. This comment is not so dissimilar from being accused of being a "teacher's pet." I do not apologize for developing a research agenda that is both a) easy to show off in demonstrations and b) has demonstrable merit. I actually prepare like crazy to ensure that I can defend my results academically. So, I shall revel in the "poster child" accusation. In the interest of self-improvement, however, I shall strive to help my colleagues create similarly rigorous research agendas. The challenge is in convincing colleagues that we will all benefit from an honest assessment of our research goals.
You know how Google will spell-check for you? For example, if you search for "britney speers," Google will respond with "Did you mean 'britney spears'?" I saw the most incredible example of this today. My query was: Oracle (+). (We were trying to understand some complex Oracle queries.) Google asked if I was looking for: Oracle outer join. It turns out that (+) is Oracle-peculiar syntax for an outer join. And Google knew this, and fixed my query for me (thereby providing the answer!).
Socioapath: A person whose deliberate disinterest prevents others from making progress. Example usage: my boss is such a socioapath that I have no idea what I should be doing. (This example is purely fictitious; my boss is gloriously hands-off. I have free rein to pursue my own research agenda.)
Our good friend ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif)
catherinew recently reminded us of the classic RPG movie "The Gamers." As a result, we decided to re-watch this greatest of all RPG-spoofs. We found a copy of "The Gamers" on bittorrent and a copy of "Gamers" on Netflix. NEVER in the history of cinema, has a single article been so important.
"The Gamers" was released in 2002 and directed by Matt Vancil. For anyone who has ever role-played, the movie is freakin' genius. Even Sky had a riotous time watching this movie. We're all looking forward to the sequel: "The Gamers: Dorkness Rising" from 2008. Netflix has this one in stock.
"Gamers" was released in 2006 and mis-directed by Christopher Folino. Thankfully, we had been fore-warned based on user comments such as "You can see horse jizz in too many other slightly better comedies." For my money, the only worse movie that springs to mind is "Narcosys." For the love of all-that-is-profane, do not confuse "Gamers" with "The Gamers!" (The user comments on IMDB only serve to exacerbate the confusion.)
PS: If anyone needs a pointer to the real "The Gamers" (available neither through Netflix, nor Amazon), drop me a note.
catherinew recently reminded us of the classic RPG movie "The Gamers." As a result, we decided to re-watch this greatest of all RPG-spoofs. We found a copy of "The Gamers" on bittorrent and a copy of "Gamers" on Netflix. NEVER in the history of cinema, has a single article been so important."The Gamers" was released in 2002 and directed by Matt Vancil. For anyone who has ever role-played, the movie is freakin' genius. Even Sky had a riotous time watching this movie. We're all looking forward to the sequel: "The Gamers: Dorkness Rising" from 2008. Netflix has this one in stock.
"Gamers" was released in 2006 and mis-directed by Christopher Folino. Thankfully, we had been fore-warned based on user comments such as "You can see horse jizz in too many other slightly better comedies." For my money, the only worse movie that springs to mind is "Narcosys." For the love of all-that-is-profane, do not confuse "Gamers" with "The Gamers!" (The user comments on IMDB only serve to exacerbate the confusion.)
PS: If anyone needs a pointer to the real "The Gamers" (available neither through Netflix, nor Amazon), drop me a note.
Definition 1: Raw goods include natural resources (things like trees, oil and water) and human resources (people's time and labor).
Definition 2: Products are items and services that are constructed using raw goods.
Definition 3: An economic system determines how to allocate raw goods to supply products to satisfy some amount of demand.
(You don't get to argue the definitions, because they're my definitions. You may not like them, but they're the definitions I'm using for the remainder of this rant.)
Premise 1: There is a finite supply of raw goods because the planet is finite and contains a finite number of people. Therefore, the supply of products is necessarily finite.
Premise 2: People are generally greedy; it's safe to assume that the demand for products is effectively infinite.
(You can argue the premises, but I think these are pretty close to self-evident.)
Theory: In Capitalism the allocation of raw goods to supply products is based on supply & demand curves. According to the "invisible hand" Capitalism will generate an optimal outcome in that as much demand as possible is being satisfied.
(This theory isn't mine, so please correct me if I misunderstand Adam Smith.)
Lemma: According to the premises, whereas absolute demand is effectively infinite, relative demand (under the theory of Capitalism) determines how many raw goods are used to generate various products.
(This one follows directly from the preceding, so you'll either need to show a false premise, or correct my understanding of Capitalism.)
Conclusion 1: The greater one's financial assets, the more control one has over relative demand, simply by choosing how to spend those assets.
Conclusion 2: Therefore, the greater one's financial assets, the more control one has over which products are developed using raw goods.
Observation: There are at least 50 American athletes making more than $15,000,000 a year. On the other hand, the median (household) income is roughly $50,000. This means that, as a society, we have decided to place 300 times more control of the economy into the hands of people based entirely on their ability to manipulate a ball (or in two cases, drive an automobile) than on the average citizen.
I don't know about you, but in the end, that strikes me as a really stupid way manage raw goods. I'm sure that many of those athletes are friendly and intelligent. But, I'm more sure that these people are not 300 times smarter than you or I at resource allocation.
Definition 2: Products are items and services that are constructed using raw goods.
Definition 3: An economic system determines how to allocate raw goods to supply products to satisfy some amount of demand.
(You don't get to argue the definitions, because they're my definitions. You may not like them, but they're the definitions I'm using for the remainder of this rant.)
Premise 1: There is a finite supply of raw goods because the planet is finite and contains a finite number of people. Therefore, the supply of products is necessarily finite.
Premise 2: People are generally greedy; it's safe to assume that the demand for products is effectively infinite.
(You can argue the premises, but I think these are pretty close to self-evident.)
Theory: In Capitalism the allocation of raw goods to supply products is based on supply & demand curves. According to the "invisible hand" Capitalism will generate an optimal outcome in that as much demand as possible is being satisfied.
(This theory isn't mine, so please correct me if I misunderstand Adam Smith.)
Lemma: According to the premises, whereas absolute demand is effectively infinite, relative demand (under the theory of Capitalism) determines how many raw goods are used to generate various products.
(This one follows directly from the preceding, so you'll either need to show a false premise, or correct my understanding of Capitalism.)
Conclusion 1: The greater one's financial assets, the more control one has over relative demand, simply by choosing how to spend those assets.
Conclusion 2: Therefore, the greater one's financial assets, the more control one has over which products are developed using raw goods.
Observation: There are at least 50 American athletes making more than $15,000,000 a year. On the other hand, the median (household) income is roughly $50,000. This means that, as a society, we have decided to place 300 times more control of the economy into the hands of people based entirely on their ability to manipulate a ball (or in two cases, drive an automobile) than on the average citizen.
I don't know about you, but in the end, that strikes me as a really stupid way manage raw goods. I'm sure that many of those athletes are friendly and intelligent. But, I'm more sure that these people are not 300 times smarter than you or I at resource allocation.
We wrapped up our Rolemaster game on Saturday. The GM certainly surprised us all!
The basic premise is that we were diplomats and explorers from the "old world" sent to open trade and political relations with the "new world." Unfortunately, we were shipwrecked off the coast of the new world, and we were the only survivors. We quickly became embroiled in local politics (the duke's evil brother was trying to kill the duke, and then the heir). We also learned that magic is real, and that we could learn magical abilities. Eventually we thwarted the evil brother and restored peace to the ducal lands.
The first weirdness was that we each had a magical "recall" talisman. Activate the talisman, and you would be instantly returned to our home continent. We also had to "mystery" skills, which we thought were related to magic, somehow. However, in actuality, we were from a near future world that had learned how to send living material from one universe to another. We had cybernetic implants so that the audience could experience what we experienced. The tokens actually recalled us to the "real" world.
However, we threw a monkey wrench into the works. Most of the characters were happy to return to the real world. My character, though, was deathly afraid of another PC who had mutilated the evil brother (cutting out his eyes and ears and tongue, just 'cause). I had hoped to escape home before that PC could, to throw myself on the mercy of the court. Instead, the evil PC was among the first to hit the recall button. Later, we were all going to be forcibly recalled. My character sprinted for somewhere to hide (as if that would help), but I was given the opportunity to try an Absurd maneuver to remain behind. I got a total of 210 on the maneuver, which meant I had a 90% chance of success. I looked down at the follow-up roll. The tens die showed ... a nine! I dejectedly looked at the ones die ... a zero! I managed to stay behind! (In a pique of player stubborn-ness another PC also stayed behind.)
So, now the two of us are living our "real" lives in the magical world, while spectators observe everything that happens. Actually, that's pretty cool! Kudos to the GM.
The basic premise is that we were diplomats and explorers from the "old world" sent to open trade and political relations with the "new world." Unfortunately, we were shipwrecked off the coast of the new world, and we were the only survivors. We quickly became embroiled in local politics (the duke's evil brother was trying to kill the duke, and then the heir). We also learned that magic is real, and that we could learn magical abilities. Eventually we thwarted the evil brother and restored peace to the ducal lands.
The first weirdness was that we each had a magical "recall" talisman. Activate the talisman, and you would be instantly returned to our home continent. We also had to "mystery" skills, which we thought were related to magic, somehow. However, in actuality, we were from a near future world that had learned how to send living material from one universe to another. We had cybernetic implants so that the audience could experience what we experienced. The tokens actually recalled us to the "real" world.
However, we threw a monkey wrench into the works. Most of the characters were happy to return to the real world. My character, though, was deathly afraid of another PC who had mutilated the evil brother (cutting out his eyes and ears and tongue, just 'cause). I had hoped to escape home before that PC could, to throw myself on the mercy of the court. Instead, the evil PC was among the first to hit the recall button. Later, we were all going to be forcibly recalled. My character sprinted for somewhere to hide (as if that would help), but I was given the opportunity to try an Absurd maneuver to remain behind. I got a total of 210 on the maneuver, which meant I had a 90% chance of success. I looked down at the follow-up roll. The tens die showed ... a nine! I dejectedly looked at the ones die ... a zero! I managed to stay behind! (In a pique of player stubborn-ness another PC also stayed behind.)
So, now the two of us are living our "real" lives in the magical world, while spectators observe everything that happens. Actually, that's pretty cool! Kudos to the GM.
This weekend was crazy busy. On Friday was Skyler's ballet rehearsal for the spring recital. Jenny was volunteering as a stage mom, and I was working tech (it's much more fun to be involved in the show).
Then, on Saturday was the spring recital. Everything went quite well; the girls were predictably cute! After that we headed out to a friend's house for a summer BBQ kickoff. They had just installed a new deck, which their dogs loved.
On Sunday, we had our regular D&D game, but we had to call it an early night because Sky needed to get to bed for school.
Oh, and in the midst of all of this, I built a bookcase for about a third of our paperbacks. This was the first time I had used a router since my sophomore year of high school, but I think the end result was rather good. The shelves are now assembled. All that remains is to stain, install, and load them.
Then, on Saturday was the spring recital. Everything went quite well; the girls were predictably cute! After that we headed out to a friend's house for a summer BBQ kickoff. They had just installed a new deck, which their dogs loved.
On Sunday, we had our regular D&D game, but we had to call it an early night because Sky needed to get to bed for school.
Oh, and in the midst of all of this, I built a bookcase for about a third of our paperbacks. This was the first time I had used a router since my sophomore year of high school, but I think the end result was rather good. The shelves are now assembled. All that remains is to stain, install, and load them.
We just signed all of the paperwork to refinance our mortgage at 4.5%. Best of all, the lender decided at the last minute not to require PMI. We're so happy to be out from under the thumb of CitiMortgage!
The Washington Post has an excellent article on the high cost of poverty. This doesn't come as a surprise to anyone who's read Nickeled and Dimed: On (Not) Getting By in America by Barbara Ehrenreich. Even so, it's a good reminder for those of us who have the luxury of shopping around for a bargain on groceries or a mortgage rate.
I've decided I'm sick of tolerance, so here's my new manifesto:
- First, All persons are fundamentally equal. Anyone who embraces discrimination is the enemy. Yes, I realize the hypocrisy of this position. Too bad!
- Second, democracy is not a panacea; there's a reason we have a Bill of Rights. So, all of you "security professionals" can kiss off. There are such things as basic human rights.
- Third, since I'm on a roll, torture is a violation of basic human rights. If we have to pay for having relied on such barbarism, that's the price of electing our leaders (see point 2).
- Fourth, neither is the "free market" a panacea. If you can't understand that corporations have more power than you and I, you are an idiot. Having established that, can I have your bank account number?
So, I kept meaning to catch up on China, but that never seemed to happen. So, instead, I'll leave behind some words of wisdom for Chinese visiting the US:
- In the US, we use queues. It is not acceptable to cut in line just because there's space. Expect to be punched if you try this common maneuver.
- Our soup spoons fit entirely in the mouth. It is considered rude to slurp your soup. Just saying.
Getting to Shanghai is truly an ordeal. My itinerary had me leaving home early Friday morning by sedan, flying from Dulles to Newark, and then on to Shanghai, arriving midday on Saturday.
Unfortunately, the first flight (Dulles to Newark) was delayed by two hours. As a result, I missed the connection in Newark. There is only one flight from Newark to Shanghai, so I was re-routed via Hong Kong. This increased the flight time from 14 hours to 16 hours and added an extra 2-1/2 hour flight to backtrack from Hong Kong to Shanghai. Thus, the total transit time turned out to be 30 hours!
The final flight was supposed to be on Shanghai Air, but you can't get a boarding pass for this airline until you are in China. Of course, there is no check-in counter for Shanghai Air in Hong Kong. Apparently, you are supposed to divine that you should check in with Qantas (from Australia), IIRC.
So, I finally arrived in Shanghai a little before midnight, along with two others who had similarly been stranded at Newark. Then, I waited for my luggage. And waited. And watched by companions from Dulles get their bags. Then watched them shut down baggage claim.
After some investigation, we determined that my luggage had decided to take the Newark to Shanghai direct flight the following day. At least that made customs easy!
Now, to find my way to the hotel. My plan was to take the maglev train, 'cause how often do you have an opportunity like that. I especially liked the fact that I wouldn't need to schlep my luggage with me. But, the train shuts down at 9:30.
About this point, a woman materializes next to me and asks, "You need hotel car?" "Um, no, I think I'll just find a taxi." "No, hotel car much better." "Really, no thanks, I'll backtrack to the terminal and find a taxi."
At this point she abandoned the hotel car tack: "Okay, I find you taxi." "Um, I can just follow the signs." "No, I find you taxi."
Against my better judgment, instead of backtracking a half mile or so to the approved taxi stands, I followed her outside to a location between the two terminals. Sure enough there were three taxis waiting there. All three immediately began jockeying for the fare. She steered me towards one, and I'm pretty sure that money changed hands.
But, it looked like a taxi, and I needed to get to the hotel. Silencing my internal Jiminy Crickett, I got into the taxi and gave the driver the destination (written out in Chinese by the conference organizers).
What transpired next was the most harrowing trip I've ever had by car. As we hurtled through the streets of Shanghai, I contemplated the likelihood of being taken to some random destination and a) having payment demanded or b) being mugged. As I enumerated by options, I realized that they were sparse, indeed. I think the list included two items: 1) going along with the demands or 2) acquiescing.
Meanwhile, we were getting closer and closer to Shanghai's other airport. This reduced the probability of b), increased the probability of a), but also increased the probability of reaching my hotel, which I knew to be close to the other (domestic) airport.
Well, all turned out fine. I made it to the hotel, and the charge was within the bounds I was told to expect (200 RMB, or $33). To put the velocity of the trip into perspective, we made the 60 km trip in less than 35 minutes. This means we averaged more than 65 mph. This includes city streets. Not for the faint of heart.
Unfortunately, the first flight (Dulles to Newark) was delayed by two hours. As a result, I missed the connection in Newark. There is only one flight from Newark to Shanghai, so I was re-routed via Hong Kong. This increased the flight time from 14 hours to 16 hours and added an extra 2-1/2 hour flight to backtrack from Hong Kong to Shanghai. Thus, the total transit time turned out to be 30 hours!
The final flight was supposed to be on Shanghai Air, but you can't get a boarding pass for this airline until you are in China. Of course, there is no check-in counter for Shanghai Air in Hong Kong. Apparently, you are supposed to divine that you should check in with Qantas (from Australia), IIRC.
So, I finally arrived in Shanghai a little before midnight, along with two others who had similarly been stranded at Newark. Then, I waited for my luggage. And waited. And watched by companions from Dulles get their bags. Then watched them shut down baggage claim.
After some investigation, we determined that my luggage had decided to take the Newark to Shanghai direct flight the following day. At least that made customs easy!
Now, to find my way to the hotel. My plan was to take the maglev train, 'cause how often do you have an opportunity like that. I especially liked the fact that I wouldn't need to schlep my luggage with me. But, the train shuts down at 9:30.
About this point, a woman materializes next to me and asks, "You need hotel car?" "Um, no, I think I'll just find a taxi." "No, hotel car much better." "Really, no thanks, I'll backtrack to the terminal and find a taxi."
At this point she abandoned the hotel car tack: "Okay, I find you taxi." "Um, I can just follow the signs." "No, I find you taxi."
Against my better judgment, instead of backtracking a half mile or so to the approved taxi stands, I followed her outside to a location between the two terminals. Sure enough there were three taxis waiting there. All three immediately began jockeying for the fare. She steered me towards one, and I'm pretty sure that money changed hands.
But, it looked like a taxi, and I needed to get to the hotel. Silencing my internal Jiminy Crickett, I got into the taxi and gave the driver the destination (written out in Chinese by the conference organizers).
What transpired next was the most harrowing trip I've ever had by car. As we hurtled through the streets of Shanghai, I contemplated the likelihood of being taken to some random destination and a) having payment demanded or b) being mugged. As I enumerated by options, I realized that they were sparse, indeed. I think the list included two items: 1) going along with the demands or 2) acquiescing.
Meanwhile, we were getting closer and closer to Shanghai's other airport. This reduced the probability of b), increased the probability of a), but also increased the probability of reaching my hotel, which I knew to be close to the other (domestic) airport.
Well, all turned out fine. I made it to the hotel, and the charge was within the bounds I was told to expect (200 RMB, or $33). To put the velocity of the trip into perspective, we made the 60 km trip in less than 35 minutes. This means we averaged more than 65 mph. This includes city streets. Not for the faint of heart.
I get to roleplay every weekend, but as a player. I must confess, though, that I miss the GM chair. Don't get me wrong, I'm adjusting to life on the other side of the GM screen. I no longer play completely ass-hat-ish characters (yes, I confess Twig was a jerk). I even like the suite of personae I've built up: Rainio ("Is it difficult? And dangerous? I'm in!") my 4.0 Warlord, Zharen ("Squishy, squishy") my RM2 Paladin that shrugged off a -90 due to a shattered knee, and Fidget ("I run away some more.") my RM2 Bard whose only melee skill is Lance (at +10).
However, I have all of these plot ideas rattling around in my brain. I guess I just like to be the one in control of the action. Sigh.
However, I have all of these plot ideas rattling around in my brain. I guess I just like to be the one in control of the action. Sigh.
Under the Freedom of Information Act, someone who undergoes a background investigation can request a copy of the materials collected as part of that investigation. The DoD, however, doesn't really want to release anything. Ever. So, they've come up with a clever workaround. Instead of denying the request (which would be blatantly illegal), the default response seems to be, "We looked for your records, but couldn't find anything. Sorry." I have to wonder, did they send the response that same hour, or did they wait a whole week out of respect for the law? Government efficiency at its best.
Sorry I haven't been around of late. After DI, Sky came down with a stomach bug. Spewed all over the carpet at our friends' condo (sorry Ken and Ev). Later that week, Jenny got the bug. Two days later, it passed to me.
Despite the bug, I do have (what I think is) a fun gaming story. Near the end of our last Rolemaster game, we were about a half mile from the heir's castle (and safety). So, sure enough, there's an ambush. Everybody is surprised (except the Rogue); we all take 2 or 3 poison darts. The party turns to fight, hoping that they can beat the enemy before falling to the poison.
Me, I recognize this as "let's capture the party." We were under attack from about 30 opponents, and all but 1 of us were poisoned. So, my Bard ("Fidget") grabs the reins of his horse and the heir's horse. I proceed to run the horses as fast as possible to safety. We had four rounds to cover about half a mile. Impossible, unless you happen to have an extremely high Ride skill. Oh, wait, Fidget's second best skill (after the Dulcian) is Ride!
Cut to the end: The Rogue escaped into the brush. Fidget and the heir made it to safety. The rest of the party are enjoying their view of the forest---from inside a cage. I'll be in China next session, so the Rogue will have to rescue the rest of the party on his own.
Oh, so why I think this is fun. The best way to foil the GM's plan was to run as fast as possible as soon as possible. Never before had so much fun running away!
Despite the bug, I do have (what I think is) a fun gaming story. Near the end of our last Rolemaster game, we were about a half mile from the heir's castle (and safety). So, sure enough, there's an ambush. Everybody is surprised (except the Rogue); we all take 2 or 3 poison darts. The party turns to fight, hoping that they can beat the enemy before falling to the poison.
Me, I recognize this as "let's capture the party." We were under attack from about 30 opponents, and all but 1 of us were poisoned. So, my Bard ("Fidget") grabs the reins of his horse and the heir's horse. I proceed to run the horses as fast as possible to safety. We had four rounds to cover about half a mile. Impossible, unless you happen to have an extremely high Ride skill. Oh, wait, Fidget's second best skill (after the Dulcian) is Ride!
Cut to the end: The Rogue escaped into the brush. Fidget and the heir made it to safety. The rest of the party are enjoying their view of the forest---from inside a cage. I'll be in China next session, so the Rogue will have to rescue the rest of the party on his own.
Oh, so why I think this is fun. The best way to foil the GM's plan was to run as fast as possible as soon as possible. Never before had so much fun running away!
On Saturday, our Destination Imagination team competed in the Regional Tournament. Let me start my saying that our girls did an amazing job. In their Instant Challenge, the team worked together beautifully and solved the problem they were given (despite a score that says otherwise). For their Team Challenge, their tower was disqualified, but they soldiered through (again despite a score that says otherwise).
Since the scoring system dissed the team so badly, allow me to evaluate Destination Imagination.
( My evaluation of DI. )
Since the scoring system dissed the team so badly, allow me to evaluate Destination Imagination.
( My evaluation of DI. )
I am proposing to start a research project for electronically managing patient consent, so I'm attending the Health Information Security and Privacy Collaboration conference (yesterday and today). It's amazing how much progress has been made so far in terms of harmonizing privacy laws from state to state. It looks like we're getting close to the point where technologists can come in and propose solutions based on a reasonably consistent set of expectations/desiderata.
Last night I participated in a city commission to streamline the process by which people get appointed to boards and commissions (i.e., I was on the commission commission). Before the meeting, I was tasked with drawing up a new procedure for discussion (i.e., that was my commission commission commission!). We made a few tweaks to my initial proposal (largely clarifying things), and the proposal should be forwarded to the Mayor and Council in the near future. Very cool to have a direct impact on city operations.
I had my (first) mid-year research review today. Normally, these are affairs where the people responsible for managing the research portfolio try to pick holes in what you're doing so that they can reclaim dollars. (The research program seems always to budget more money than they have.) Today, there were some questions about the technical approach, but I had the right experts in the room to allay any concerns. Moreover, it sounds like we are virtually certain to get another round of funding for next year. I must say, it's really nice to be responsible for a project staffed by really bright people. My job is simply to point them in the right direction, make sure they have the necessary raw materials, and help to coordinate across the different research threads (databases, machine learning and security).
I just got off the phone with the insurance company regarding Jenny's surgery last September. Apparently one of the assisting surgeons was out of network. Which normally means, no coverage. However, the insurance company said, "Obviously your wife didn't have any choice in who the assistant was, so we'll re-process the claim and pay him." They also indicated that the surgeon may try to collect more than the 'reasonable and customary' amount they pay, so if we get a bill, we should call Aetna, and they'll straighten it out. We don't have to pay a dime (a nice change from the last post).
Color me astounded. I've never in my life gotten such good customer service from an HMO!
Color me astounded. I've never in my life gotten such good customer service from an HMO!
